This week’s coming to a close, which means tomorrow I’ve got to start coming up with another idea so I can start writing another short story.
(Having already come up with an idea = Relief. Having to come up with another = Apprehension.)
But first…
THE WEEK IN REVIEW:
The theme:
‘Death and cheating death’
My goals were:
Speed~
:(
I failed at this. I think I’m in ‘editor mode’ right now, because I was only able to write about half of my story, but what came out felt more polished than what a rough draft should be.
But, what I fail at during this week, I can always succeed at during the next.
This story is something I’m going to want to revisit after the workshop is over because I really like the idea behind The Never-Ending Night.
Quantity~
:(
Since I didn’t actually finish the story, again, I failed at this. I still only have three completed short stories to my name.
Writing at home~
:|
While I did write at home more often than before, I still have a long way to go with this goal. I didn’t commit to this every day, and even let the video game bug bite me a few times too many.
Ideas~
:)
While I did come up with an idea for this week, I felt it was a good idea, so I didn’t get the chance to cultivate a ‘bad idea’ yet. I’m just glad I came up with an idea at all, let alone one worth writing.
Planning~
:D
I was able to come up with a complete outline instead of ‘pantsing’ it.
NotFantasy~
:D
I was able to set this story in a fantasy setting! I’m so glad because this is the first short story I’ve ever written that could be considered high fantasy, and only the second I’ve ever written that could be considered fantasy at all.
FlowingWords~
:D
A few weeks ago I posed the questions: ‘Is writing a short story really so much harder than writing a blog post?’ and ‘Does it have to be?’.
These past two weeks have presented an answer.
Writing a short story is harder. In fact, it’s also hard to read a short story or snippet in the form of a blog post. So not only is it more taxing on the mind to write a short story, but it’s also more taxing to read for the same reasons.
And now for the short story itself~
The title:
The Never-Ending Night
Quick summary:
With the help of Death, despite fair warnings, a man enters the Eternal Night Realm to bring back his ex-wife who he thinks he loves, only to find out she’s grown ugly. When he sees this, he abandons her.
When he returns, to his dismay his mistress abandons him, because the afterworld also twisted his looks.
The checklist:
:D It had a definite beginning, middle, and end.
:) It had an inevitable, profound, and emotional ending.
:) The MC changes for the worse throughout the course of the story.
:D It worked in a fantasy setting.
Excerpt: (One of the rules of this workshop is we may only share 100 words of our short stories)
“Another shot. And another. This one they called the ‘black hole’, which was suitable enough. I’d been falling down a hole for years– No hope of climbing out.
When you fail at life, that’s one thing. But when you live in a small town, everybody knows it. They purse their lips and get smug and let you know in not-so-very-subtle ways.
Then the stranger walked in– A tall man in black who came during the late hours. He smelt of salt and iron, had pale-blue skin, and wiry gray hair like you’d expect on a bog witch.
We tried following …”
And yes, writing a short is harder than writing a blog post, but then writing any fiction is harder than non-fiction :)
Good first week, keep going!
[Reply]
Comment by Merrilee Faber — May 16, 2010 @ 3:27 pm
Do I even need to mention that I like your theme? ;)
However, your excerpt doesn’t sound all that short, considering it’s a short story. How short would it be, if you finished it?
May I just say something on the text of that excerpt? (I think after you wanted some opinions on your Cirellio snippet, I could offer some more opinions on your texts, no?) The part about the stranger walking in sounds like you have a checklist of things you feel you’re obliged to mention. How he looks, how he smells, what he wears, and something to compare him to. The first two paragraphs I liked very much, but then the description of the stranger felt like a stumble. Maybe mostly because you already mentioned that this stranger is supposed to be Death, and I imagined that in a short story someone like Death would rather remain without such detailed description. After all, it doesn’t matter a bit how Death looks or smells. Not in a short story, not to me.
Hope this opinion wasn’t unasked for.
[Reply]
Comment by packsister — May 16, 2010 @ 5:37 pm
“your excerpt doesn’t sound all that short”
I’m not sure what you mean… it’s 100 words?
“How short would it be, if you finished it?”
I’m a little over halfway at 1000, so perhaps 1500-2000, perhaps shorter. Which is good because my other short stories are all under 1000 words and 2000 is sometimes more salable.
“(I think after you wanted some opinions on your Cirellio snippet, I could offer some more opinions on your texts, no?)”
Sure, of course critiques are welcome but you misunderstood me– I wasn’t looking for a full-out critique on the 5R excerpt, just some kind of acknowledgement that it was perused at some point, like a comment that says ‘Hey, I read this!’. But I was flattered you gave me a complete review and a bit surprised.
“sounds like you have a checklist of things you feel you’re obliged to mention.”
I don’t know about that… Keep in mind the reader would have no idea this man is Death, and neither does the main character, yet. This might be a situation where you’d need to see the whole story. If you want, I can email you the final product when I’m finished.
[Reply]
Comment by Nick Enlowe — May 16, 2010 @ 7:38 pm
I meant that it sounds like a bit out of a longer story. But yes, your end result sounds indeed like a short story the way I understand short stories.
I guess what made me feel that way was that I would have expected a mystery about the man coming in. And at that point it doesn’t matter at all if I know who it is or not, it doesn’t even matter who that man is, Death or the king or the new neighbour. A detailed description of his looks and his smell takes away a lot from him, at least for me. Actually, that thing about the scent… It indicates to me that your protagonist either made a point of inhaling when the stranger walked past him, or the stranger stinks so much that everyone can smell him from a mile. Either option is kind of weird, sorry. Heh.
I would very much like to read the complete story! You know my email? killernager@gmx.de
[Reply]
Comment by packsister — May 17, 2010 @ 4:00 am
I think you should know the paragraph you keep mentioning was meant as a placeholder until I could think of something better to say in its place. It was a lead-in to the next paragraph to keep me writing under the bullet of one week, and I did plan to change it in the rewrite.
What I was going for was he had the scents of the sea and dead bodies about him, which made the bar patrons uneasy.
Like if a pirate walks into a bar, I might mention he smells of salt. That doesn’t necessarily mean that he stinks.
If Death sat down at a bar, and I had no idea he was Death, I’d probably think him a bit off, too.
[Reply]
Comment by Nick Enlowe — May 17, 2010 @ 8:02 am
[Reply]
Comment by packsister — May 17, 2010 @ 2:50 pm
[Reply]
Comment by Nick Enlowe — May 17, 2010 @ 3:03 pm