What a beast scene three has turned out to be! (I’ll explain why in a bit.)

It involves three characters: Asyria, Larimosa, and Dahjal. (And the temple servants)

The backdrop is the Temple of Marais … actually, the rune-covered central chamber of the temple, known as ‘the convergence’, built over where the ley lines of Kassara intersect.

Asyria is a young child who also happens to be the Meiallin, the most powerful mystic in the world. She is practicing the art of projecting herself to the fourth ring from within the convergence.

Larimosa is Asyria’s mother, a giver who has shown her child the less fortunate people of the world (in hopes of showing her how to be virtuous before her title and power has a chance to go to her head), letting her play regularly with underprivileged children and giving Asyria many chances to be generous—something the troubled world of Lura has eagerly taken notice of.

Larimosa recognizes Dahjal as ‘Giver Greggor’, a famous living saint who has travelled the world performing miracles.

While he is easily able to fool Larimosa with his kindness, Asyria isn’t so easily deceived. When she whispers her suspicions of Greggor to her mother, Greggor is humbly requested to leave them and wait until they’ve finished discussing the matter. However, Greggor manages to turn the tables on Asyria’s seven ray manipulations when he has her mother leave the room instead. 

At that point, he is able to convince Asyria his intentions are pure, and convinces her to help him seek out the brightest stars in the fourth ring. (Seven rays users can see a starfield, and everyone has a corresponding star. The brightest stars are the people most important to the world at any given time.)

The problem with this scene is I’ve written it from all three perspectives and they all have their advantages and disadvantages. The best way to do it seems to be from Dahjal (Greggor)’s point of view.  But by completely rewriting the scene three times, I’ve broken the anti-perfectionist rule. Still, at this stage in the game, I need to be absolutely positively sure how each scene goes before proceeding to the next. I need to stamp out a few inconsistencies before proceeding.

Word count to follow…

Prev: On prologues | Next: End of the prologue, chapter one begins!